"There is nothing more rare, nor more beautiful, than a woman being unapologetically herself; comfortable in her perfect imperfection. To me, that is the true essence of beauty."
---Dr. Steve Maraboli
The day I decided I loved my body was one of the best and most liberating days of my life. I use the word "decided" because it wasn't something that happened naturally. It was a conscious choice. It didn't happen because I achieved my "goal weight'. It didn't happen because I could fit into my "skinny" jeans. It didn't happen because of anything external. It happened the day I decided to embrace my imperfections and stop trying to look "perfect"--- because perfection is subjective, and pretty much nonexistent.
Wanting to look perfect is one of the biggest enemies of happiness. Seeking physical perfection trains your brain to think you're not what you should be. This, coupled with the unrealistic and digitally-enhanced images we are constantly bombarded with through magazines, television, the internet, etc., often leaves us with intense feelings that we are "less than".
I love the wonderful counsel of Jeffrey R. Holland in his talk, "To Young Women". He says, "I plead with you young women to please be more accepting of yourselves, including your body shape and style, with a little less longing to look like someone else. We are all different. Some are tall, and some are short. Some are round, and some are thin. And almost everyone at some time or other wants to be something they are not! But as one adviser to teenage girls said: "You can't live your life worrying that the world is staring at you. When you let people's opinions make you self-conscious, you give away your power...The key to feeling confident is to always listen to your inner self---the real you."1
"Every young woman is a child of destiny and every adult woman a powerful force for good. I mention adult women because you are our greatest examples and resources for these young women. And if you are obsessing over being a size 2, you won't be very surprised when your daughter does the same and makes herself physically ill trying to accomplish it. WE SHOULD ALL BE AS FIT AS WE CAN BE---THAT'S GOOD WORD OF WISDOM DOCTRINE. THAT MEANS EATING RIGHT AND EXERCISING AND HELPING OUR BODIES FUNCTION AT THEIR OPTIMUM STRENGTH. WE COULD PROBABLY ALL DO BETTER IN THAT REGARD. BUT I SPEAK HERE OF OPTIMUM HEALTH; THERE IS NO UNIVERSAL OPTIMUM SIZE.
Frankly, the world has been brutal with you in this regard. You are bombarded in movies, television, fashion magazines, and advertisements with the message that looks are everything! The pitch is, "If your looks are good enough, your life will be glamorous and you will be happy and popular." That kind of pressure is immense in the teenage years, to say nothing of later womanhood.
In terms of preoccupation with self and a fixation on the physical, this is more than social insanity; it is spiritually destructive, and it accounts for much of the unhappiness women face in the modern world."2
What are some thoughts you can ponder and meditate on as you attempt to love your body? Here are a few of my favorites:
*Contemplate the idea that your body isn't your art project, but rather the vehicle which enables you to serve those around you and make the world around you a better place.
*Pay attention to at least 10 things per day that your body does for you (breathing, walking, bending, chewing, digesting, seeing, touching, etc) and say "thank you" to your body for making these things possible for you. When was the last time you thanked your heart for beating?
*Consider that your body is a gift from God which houses your divine spirit, and therefore deserves love and respect from you.
*Dont compare your body to other bodies. Comparisons are often distorted and usually lead to discontentment or false pride, both of which are toxic to the soul.
*Dont compare your body to other bodies. Comparisons are often distorted and usually lead to discontentment or false pride, both of which are toxic to the soul.
*Talk about your body as if it belongs to someone you love, because it does!
Always continue to nourish your body with wholesome foods, healthy movement, and plenty of sunshine, while continually keeping in mind that you are doing these things because you love your body, not because you don't!
1.Julia DeVillers, Teen People, Sept 2005, 104.
2.Jeffrey R. Holland, "To Young Women", General Conference, 2005.
Great article. "Maybe you should go and love yourself"
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely way of approaching this subject. I especially liked your thoughts to ponder and meditate. My favorite is the first one regarding the idea that our bodies are not our art project, but rather the vehicle by which we can lift and bless others. It is disappointing to see how many people are consumed with the idea that their body is their greatest achievement. While I think it is admirable to have a nice body, it should not be our ultimate achievement.
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